


Lotor's Journal

by KingGrace



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-01
Updated: 2018-08-01
Packaged: 2019-06-20 05:51:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,217
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15527529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KingGrace/pseuds/KingGrace
Summary: Lance finds the journal of Lotor who they have recently battled. In this journal he doesn't just reveal secrets but an entire life story.





	1. Chapter 1

Everything had been so heavy in the past few days. First Lotor seemed to have gotten close to Allura, completely excluding Lance himself, next up he appeared to have a harvest of quintessence on a new planet with Alteans he had hidden from the world. He never trusted Lotor from the very start, something seemed off about him, but Lance had never expected it to be Mass murder. Even so, things were still not adding up after Keith came back from who may know where with his mother, and Altean and a space wolf that could teleport. No, he definitely had not seen that coming after them. As if things were not weird enough yet, Lotor seemed to have gone mad and practically destroyed everything they had left. The good thing was, now they were heading home, each in their own lion carrying their belongings. The massive constellations passing by, sometimes stopping at an inhabited planet to get necessities and perhaps a place to sleep. Well, they always had a place to sleep somewhere, with the news spreading fast about the fact that they didn't just cancel out Zarkon, but now his ridiculous son too. Both of them were maniacs, the universe is better off without them.

The rummaging of Keith's bag was getting on his nerves, the ravenette seemed to have forgotten something and so ran off into another room. They were located on a distant planet far away from all the drama they had been through, something they needed for now. Something like a vacation. The best thing was, this place looked quite similar to Lance's hometown. The only difference being the lack of people who had all migrated to the other side of the mountain for the monthly harvest. Being as kind as they were the inhabitants let the paladins and entourage stay in their village for the summer, which lasted about three to four weeks, enough time for the all of them to relax and do some healing. 

The view was astounding, watching over the many colourful and exotic flowers, the waters rocking against the sand and on top of that a bright star shining down upon his own sun-kissed skin. The Cuban missed the feeling of home and since the past few years this situation the closest he had gotten to those wishful shores and soft waves that reached up to his house near the coast. The ocean where he would go fishing with his cousin over the summer, Hunk probably missed it too. Just remembering how his mother used to stand in the cold waters, splashing his siblings with water until she was dragged down the waves as a form of punishment, it almost made him tear up. Since they we're unpacking now he could just walk off with his belongings and head for his "house" where he would be staying. A small bright blue house decorated in yellow, purple and white flowers, completely wrapping their stems around each corner making the blue barely visible. This didn't feel like just a house, it felt close to home. 

When finally entering the house, no longer staring at its exterior, Lance met the incredibly decorated interior. There were all kinds of holo shells and furs, flowers peeking through cracks and something grass like as a floor. Not exactly like grass, but like a carpet? It felt sturdy but soft, almost like a carpet but it was probably just planted as a floor into the houses or just this house. They had fun ways of decorating and Lance was thinking about coming to visit this beautiful place with his family when they got back. 

Warm feelings filled his chest as the lean body sat down on the edge of the bed, throwing the bags in the corner as Kaltenecker popped her head out of the window for a second, scanning the area Lance was staying in before she made her way roaming around again exploring the small part of the island of her own. She had already rested her hooves in water before she felt cooled off enough and left to check up on everyone. With her job to check up on Lance being done she was eating some flowers somewhere where she wanted to be.

With his hands held in one another Lance looked down at the floor, then the wardrobe and the kitchen, the bathroom, some weird room with nothing but a chair in it and some flowers. An odd room with white walls, the colourless chair and white flowers growing on the ceiling, very, very odd.

As he started unpacking his bags familiar white hair popped around the corner. It was Allura. "Lance! I found your notebook on the ground the other day and after asking around I found out it belongs to none of us. so I came to bring it back to you." Quickly she pressed the quite thick notebook embedded with cursive decorations and a small lock on the side of it into his lanky hands, almost causing him to drop it instantly. "Would not want to lose something that looks this important to you." Quite confused he looked down at the notebook, a colourful blue with white, gold, and some hints of orange. It looked like nothing he ever bought, but perhaps, he had no idea. "Thanks, Allura, maybe you can stay for a bit and-" He spoke nervously, but Allura already cut him off "-I will be helping Shiro's with unpacking since he only has one arm and everything." A nervous, fake chuckle. "Yeah that seems reasonable, don't keep him waiting." With a wave, her hair bounced back around the corner.

Now. The notebook. Now having it in his hands he noticed the decorations being hand carved, smoothly lined and perfectly symmetrical. Whoever made this was incredibly good at this that Lance thought it was made by machinery. With a heavy sigh, he rubbed his fingers across the carvings, until he found a loose piece on the back. Was it broken? That would be such a waste, however when Lance tried to see the damage of the notebook he accidentally pulled on it. "Shit." He couldn't help but call out swearing, immediately apologizing to himself and making a mental note. Although, it seemed it was stitched in such a way for it to be opened and closed, inside of the open piece was a small area for a key, dangling around a chain like a thin necklace. While holding it into the star's light he noticed it is made of something like glass, no wait, diamond? Whatever it was, it was a crystal and it was beautiful, just like everything here and these hand-carved decorations. It made him wonder who this notebook was from. It was already too late to give it back to Allura now anyways since he basically admitted it to be his. 

Quite enthusiastically Lance stuck the key into the lock, turning around the handle only to hear a satisfying click, then another, and then another. Three clicks? Unusual, but hey it was an alien notebook what place was he in to judge. As he opened it up the pages seemed all to be handwritten, starting with a sloppy handwriting that slowly became more and more consistent, perfect. The first page was empty, just like the last few pages. After trying to flip through those last pages he noticed a few stuck to one another or ripped out, soaked or wrecked. If he wanted to read it he had to do so from the start, so that is where he read what was written on the inside of the cover.

'Everything comes with time, everything. I know it will not be easy once the trials start, so I decided I would give you something for your birthday which you would never forget my son. I made this for you, hiding it until you would become old enough to find this in the back of the library. I know I will not be around for much longer, so I want to give you this notebook to write down everything until the day you manage to bring me back. I will wait for you, just as patiently as you always are when it comes to things like this. Hold on for me. I love you, Lotor." Lance practically dropped the notebook if he had not been curious enough for the name written underneath the confusing text. "Honerva." Where had he heard that before... Honerva. Maybe he could as Coran later on today, he wouldn't ask questions unlike a certain someone.

While tugging the notebook below his pillow he got the key out again, actually bothering to lock it up before leaving it underneath there. He didn't feel as if he needed to keep the key anywhere close, however, so he just threw that on top of the pillow so he could find it easily when he would get back later on. They planned to be spending time together and build a campfire on the beach, perhaps eat some almost marshmallows Hunk had managed to create the night prior. It was something Lance had been looking forward to and for the aliens to experience., maybe also Keith since he seemed to be the kind of person who didn't eat marshmallows. Having wrapped up the unpacking of his belongings Lance moved his bags underneath the bed, storing it somewhere far away as he moved out of the bright house, making his way over to the beach where Shiro and Keith had been gathering dry materials to lit on fire.

It was going to be a fun night.

 

-

 

After the dropped and burnt marshmallows were being swallowed up by the smoldering ashes Lance stretched his body out while being spread out on the now cooling off sand. Most of them had already gone to sleep so it has basically just Lance who was still up to watch the unfamiliar constellations. Those bright stars that twinkled in his dark blue eyes, almost causing a Galaxy to be born in his irises. The view of everything here was perfect, warm-hearted, and simply loving. It was as if could basically touch the beaches back home when feeling the sand nest itself in his brown frizzly, recently cut short hair. The after-heat below the sand, the calm rocketing of water which was nearing his feet. It was almost as if he wasn't really there at all, simply looking at someone else's best memories of a place too wonderful.

As Lance wanted to get up something was felt below his hand. Both terrified and shocked by what he found in his hand he raised it up to the sky, seeing how the bright lights reflected in those hand-carved designs, shining a white shimmer onto the beautiful notebook. That book that seemed to be so incredibly precious, but at the same time written off as nothing. The lock making it seem as if it was waiting to be opened with the sudden transparent appearance, just like the key. When the mention of the key was made in his head a light weight was felt in his hand, which he was leaning on to remain balanced. The emotion of fear had completely lost his mind as soon as he felt a push from something he didn't know, a mental push to unlock not just the notebook but so much more.

With the steadiest hands the Cuban has had in years he unlocked the key, hearing a single click. He expected the same writing, the same letters, and the same sight. What he was faced with instead were all black papers, the letters had gone and the ripped out pages were restored. It was like magic, but knowing something like that actually exists now it wasn't weighing on his mind. As his hands scanned over the pages nothing seemed to change, but something told him to search, to start it, start a story. So there Lance was, lit by the lighting of a thousand stars with a weird glowing book and all dark pages, ready to start the first chapter of this book. His fingers scanned through the pages until he reached the first page where surprisingly text started to appear. A shining bright white ink, lighting up every part of Lance's face while reading. The letters seemed to appear as fast as someone could write as if Lotor -the original bearer of this notebook- was a little kid sitting beside Lance watching him until he would start reading the first few pages which were being written down in a slow pace. Each letter is carefully thought through as if he was practicing his handwriting which seemed completely perfect and gorgeous to Lance who had the handwriting of a typical teenager. So he started reading and as soon as he was reading he noticed the writing to be of a much younger Lotor. This is what he read.


	2. Chapter 1

As soon as Lance started to read, it seemed as if the words flew along with where his eyes followed, making it seem to chase Lance his eyes, wanting to be read by those same blue eyes as their previous owner, and their owner before that. If words could have a will of their own they would fly towards those who had interest to read, which in this case was no one else but a simple boy from Cuba. He wasn't special, he wasn't completely unique, but that made him Lance. His quirks and perks, his laughter and his smile, his beauty and his grace, the softness and the determination. Everything was so simple, yet so perfectly thought out to make him the person who he is. He was taken into consideration on how to be created, and so he had lived every day of his life as the person he claims to be no matter how much he would want to be somebody else. Those words made him feel the person who he was.   
  
_ I am not really sure who will read this someday. Perhaps it can be my mother or a friend I will meet in the distant future. For anyone who is reading this now, I guess I have a story to tell about my life of late. I decided to write it down in case it will ever get a place of rest or form an inspiration for someone else. I do not want to go far into details with the things that happened apart from how I want to build my way up from here. Simply said, my learning capacity is slower than the other students, and on top of that my hybrid nature gives me a disadvantage in the training simulations and weekly competitions.   
  
I am not saying that I will never grow to be more than I am now, I am simply stating that as of now I do not meet their requirements. I will push myself a bit further and try to stay up as long as I can, anything to find that recognition that I wish to show that I can possess. There is no attention given towards arts or culture, everything seems to be merely brutal. I can't find myself in a group with any of those people, even my last resort had been taken from me for a while. There are things I can't describe, like the pain I feel every time I make a blunder. The beating of that annoying whip or the disgraceful looks that glare down upon my smaller body. I don't fit in. Perhaps if I were stronger or a quick learner I could show them my worth. It will take time but I know I can get there with effort and determination. _   
  
Lance had to take a deep breath. There were some things he could recognize himself in as a child, sometimes even in the present when times were not as amazing. To read about a child in such an environment as the Galra was tough and probably beyond words to describe. That is exactly when it happened. The simplistic thought of 'not describable in words' was reason enough for the magic of this incredible book to do the job for Lance. The light shined so brightly that Lance reached with his hands for his eyes, dropping the book in the process.   
  
There in the middle, after he had opened his eyes again, stood a child. A bright child with barely even an identifiable face. There were two features that made Lance realize who he had here right in front of him. First of all, the gorgeous bright blue eyes, not yet intoxicated by the yellow pollution behind those lights. It wasn't the usual blue he recognized, but a brighter and softer blue, one that had not been touched before by anything that was not supposed to be there. The second characteristic was the white flowy hair which reached the child's shoulders. The colours were faint and before he could even focus his eyes on that light the shapes changed. A voice appeared, a light voice, slightly higher pitched and with the Royal British accent Lance knew he could never achieve. "Lance?"    
  
As soon as the name slipped off the tip of his tongue the kid started to run away, hair dancing in the nonexistent wind. Not wanting to lose any of the input with whatever was going on Lance picked up the book and wanted to try and continue reading or close the book, but neither seemed to be working. The letters were gone, the lock and key were gone, the sea was gone, the flowers were gone... The setting had changed. Instead of the cliffs with water throwing themselves up the dangerous rocks, it was a hill with the most gorgeous white and red flowers Lance had ever seen. If you touched a red flower it turned white. If you touched a white flower it turned red.   
  
Down below was nothing more than a trillion other flowers all unique in shape and colour. Colours Lance had never known to exist and also was pretty sure not to exist anywhere else.    
  
"It is my home." Again a bright voice was heard, Lance immediately looking to his side to face the small Lotor, much less refined and perfect then what he had known him as. A child. "We always used to spend time here before everything was lost. We would make crowns of flowers and pretend to be the same as everyone else as we put it on our heads." Lotor seemed to be enjoying himself while they both sat down, looking at the far sight of the horizon. Multiple stars seemed to orbit this planet, casting nothing but light and warmth over Lance's skin. His usual beautifully tanned skin had turned a bright pale, shining himself too. Was he inside the book? Or was the light bright enough to shine on him?   
  
A small, soft hand was felt on his own. Small claws held perfectly neat onto Lance his own rough guitar fingers. And so the story continued, this time told by the child who sat beside him as they enjoyed the world given to them.   
  
_ There is this feeling lingering inside of me which does not want to let go of something inflicting, like a raging fire. If I can manage to get a grip on that energy, I can start using it to my liking. I have been practicing with controlling that burst of energy inside of me, but no positive results yet. It seems whatever this energy may be is of great use, the greater good. Everything must always be for the greater good, right? Always try to preserve that which you love, even if that means you have to sacrifice everything you love. I will get you back mother. I must face the same challenge seeing as your blood runs through my veins as well, but also that of the tyrant. I must stay strong and keep up my walls, I can not let anyone in and change my thoughts into that of the Galra. I want to be the heartwarming, loving Altean I always dreamed of. Like you mama.   
  
You had once taught me how to differentiate my skin, however, no matter how much I practice everything seems to go to waste. I have been stuck with a pale white skin colour for almost a week, I could barely go out to get food without being thrown to the side laughed at. Thankfully I met this girl who helped me and taught me many things I had never thought of before. _   
  
At the mention of the girl, a new bright child appeared, behind Lance this time. Instead of sitting beside Lance she sat down in front of them, causing them all to sit in a triangle shapes figure. Like a little star, she giggled as she saw her friend. Both of them as adorable as they were seemed to stay in the act as the story continues. There were no second thoughts on their mind or a third party. Their world was right in front of them.   
  
It was only around now that Lance noticed that the child had never been speaking from the very start, but instead, there was a voice projected into his head like a movie, playing over a muted mime. With the realization being made the children distanced themselves, starting to run down the hill playing with the wind. Each of the flowers changing another colour as they ran by, the opposite of what they were. This setting felt unreal, even now Lance couldn't handle what was going on anymore. What he did know was, he wanted to see the end of this picture perfect.   
  
_ I do not want to just tell the negative things that happened, so let me just change it for a bit before you think this will be an all-out sob story. The girl I met is named Acxa, she has a different skin like I do, but a deep blue like the seas from her home. She excels at fighting combat through the dancing traditions she always tells me about, sometimes teaching me. She introduced me to music and songs, also the dancing, so many incredible things. She says I have good rhythm and flexibility to learn quickly. I know that if we keep practicing together we can become the strongest duo and perhaps grow into more together. _   
  
Slowly the children started to dance with the wind, following the same steps and swinging around the same arms. It was nothing but the storytelling voice until loud beats were heard from behind Lance, however, when he looked around there was nothing but the same white and red flowers as above the hill. With the beat being put into place the children beat their feet to the ground, stomping into motion with the drums and the wind as their guidance as to what way to move to, or what direction to face.    
  
__ I want to teach her things too, but that will require lots of all-nighters for me to study not just socialism but steal the secret books from the library about cultures and traditions. I have found a book about her home planet but  I have not told her about it yet. In it, I found very beautiful cursive traditional body markings like the one she has on her back.   
  
I hope she will love it.   
  
Child Lotor was nothing like adult Lotor. Curiosity kills the cat. Eager for more answers Lance ran down the hill, except the flowers he touched didn't turn another colour but a plain white. With childish laughter the children ran away, hiding into the higher parts until their voices had echoed out. Out of breath, Lance eventually stopped running with his chest heaving from nothing but adrenaline. His eyes darted around the flower fields which seemed much higher up close, blocking his view from the beautiful horizon he saw before. The colourful flowers from before were the bright white from the stars, slowly the darkness wrapping around the bold lights like a long lost gift until Lance could wink his eyes again when staring up at the night sky. His hair ruffling in the wind, the loose tank top hanging on the ground, his shorts filled with sands and his toes freed from his sandals which had found somewhere to live on their own. Whereas all this time Lance had been on the ground looking at the sky while the amazing dream had taken over not just his sight but all of his senses, the sun had started to rise on this side of the mountain now too. With his hands resting behind him keeping up his torso Lance just looked bewildered at the book which rested in between his legs, the key dangling around his neck.    
  
The book was open, resting on the page where the day described had ended. On the next page were a few words scribbled in not the same handwriting or even on the same kind of paper. A single white paper with monospaced writing black ink spilled letters typed on.   
  
“Be prepared for what comes today.”   
  
[Next chapter Lance will see the consequences of reading the story]   



End file.
